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woohooligan Oct 10, 2016
woohooligan NEW! Check out our best laughs from 2016!
We all know the apocalypse is coming, it's only a matter of time. And we all know resources will be scarce after the world ends. If there's anything shows like Mad Max and the Walking Dead have taught us, it's this: of all the things we'll need to survive, food, water, shelter, medecine... the most precious, the absolute rarest thing in the entire world, will be color. This is because the first sign of any apocalypse, whether biblical or technological, is that every brightly colored anything will immediately burst into flames. You'll see mushroom clouds and falling shrapnel over every Toys-R-Us and ice-cream parlor. The once beacon of civilization, visible on every street-corner in the entire world, the McDonalds golden arches, all gone. Of course if you live in a gay neighborhood like LA's Castro, you won't survive the event, but you'll be happy to know your demise will be FABULOUS! Gay to gray in a drag-queen's gaudy wink... No queer eye under a gray sky.

While children will suffer, none will be harder hit than clowns. To be fair, this is kind of a win-win. The clowns' suffering will be short and when it's over the rest of us will enjoy a world free of clowns. Most mimes however will be tragically spared, thanks to their love of costumes with circa industrial-revolution, prison-uniform-style stripes. I'll be trully grateful I don't live in Paris at the time and have to run from roving mime gangs coming at me with invisible chainsaws.

It is such a truism... everyone just knows. All the attendees at the annual post-apocalyptic festival in southern California, Wasteland Weekend, know that only four colors will really survive: gray, brown, black and the occasional red.

I do have to wonder about Cincinnati. Tiff and I live in Dayton, Ohio, about an hour north of the Queen City and driving through I notice two things: first, it was once popular to paint houses in those neighborhoods bright and pastel colors, and secondly, so many of those houses in those houses are condemned, it looks like the apocalypse has already come. Most of the city really looks like the apocalypse as imagined by Tim Burton... or maybe Willy Wonka... the Wonkalypse. Will those beautiful, abandoned trash-heaps survive, or will they too be destroyed for daring to hold on to their peeling paints? Will Cincinatti become the haven of color in a gray world? I don't have any answers, but at least I have some canned Star-Wars-shaped pasta. :P

Happy Halloween, Hooligans! This comic is a collaboration with my friend Travis Blair. Also, I published the monthly update on our Patreon and among the good news, we found someone to help us with marketing on our shoestring budget, and we got a really cool review from Pippa Bailey of the Ghoul Guides! I would be lying if I said that working on my dream job here is all sunshine and rainbows, but frustrating or not, it's nice to feel that progress is happening. And I keep in mind that success almost never lands in someone's lap without a great deal of struggle. I heard on public radio the other day that Ghandi's entire famiy mortgaged everything they owned to send him to law school, only to have him graduate and lose his first case... and second, and third, and fourth, and fifth... as an attorney he was a miserable failure, despite costing his family what was essentially everything they had in the world, all before he found his true voice as a civil rights leader.

But what am I doing talking about Ghandi?! Jeez! You'd think I listen to NPR or something. God forbid, people think I'm a civil rights nerd, or a "social justice warrior". Ooh, people might think I give a shit. The horror! Anyway, I think the better story, certainly the funnier story is from Louis CK who said he spent fifteen years getting nowhere with comedy before he finally had his breakthrough in his late thirties, early forties, thanks to an interview with George Carlin.

So I hold out hope that if I keep working hard at my comedy, soon I'll find my breakthrough, making the world a better, more joyful place through laughter! :D

So if you'd like to help me on that journey, a pledge of as little as one dollar on our patreon will give you access to the bonus panel from this comic and at least 79 others, or if you can't pledge a dollar, please share this sweet review from Pippa and the Ghoul Guides! And stay awesome, hooligans!

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