Roadside Porn
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woohooligan Jul 21, 2012
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Welcome to the world's chattiest porn shop. D'oh! Most folks aren't so open about their fetishes with complete strangers... or they're trying to keep a low profile because they don't want to be recognized by someone else in the shop. Oh hi, Deacon, I didn't know you shopped here... see you at church on Sunday!

Yesterday I came up with a great title for this strip and apparently promptly forgot it... What would you hooligans have named it? Porn Across America? Fuck Stop?

This is just one of those things you think about on a long car trip... Tiff and I were house hunting in the rust belt last week and drove through Texas, Arkansas, Tennessee, Kentucky, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois and Missouri and I'm pretty sure we saw at least one of these rural porn shop signs in every state. What else... oh yeah, billboards advertising "black market fireworks"... because, y'know, people who are selling illegal stuff always make sure to market it with giant billboards that can be easily seen by every passing state trooper. That's how I get all my cocaine. ;P

Though now we've got a tough decision to make... We could move to Ohio and spend most of the money we have buying a house and moving up there... or we could move out to the styx here in Texas and save most of our money buying a manufactured home that will build no equity but only cost us $100/mo in property taxes. But that also means spending another $100/mo on a colo for my web server, so I'm not sure it does much for our monthly expenses... It's tempting to save the extra money and use it to buy vending machines or some other side-business, but I discovered that average profit from a single vending machine is only $25/mo, so I'd need at least 4 of them just to cover the taxes... even if I spent all the extra cash we'd have after buying the house, I'm not sure if there would be enough vending machines to replace my disability. Probably not... It costs about $1k per machine, so the machine only pays itself off after about 3.5 years. Is there a business with better turnaround? Oh yeah... porn! D'oh!

Stay awesome, Hooligans!

p.s. I took some inspiration for the writing and art style on this strip from a strip called Bug. Not that Adam needs any help from me, but you should check him out, it's funny stuff!

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cesium133 Jun 30, 2013
That reminds me of the time I went on a trip that required crossing Missouri. At every exit there were two billboards: one read "Adult Superstore This Exit", the other "Jesus" (and nothing else). By the time I left Missouri I was wondering how much money Jesus was making on all his Adult Superstores.
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